9 Things NOT to Say to a Mom of Twins

Being a mom of twins you hear it all….like a gazillion times!

When people find out you are carrying twins you already get so much unwanted attention with people asking all sorts of questions. But once the twins were born I got some seriously (not so) hilarious questions. And it’s not just from people you know. Sometimes also complete strangers think it’s alright to ask questions which will make no mater whatsoever difference to their lives (see question #5)

I thought why not share my wonderful experience at motherhood with all of you too.

Twin moms out there can have a good laugh relating to similar experiences and other read and learn.

 

So here it goes:

  1. Are they twins?

The number 1 thing a mother of twins gets asked is “Are they twins”? It’s cute for sometime but as they start getting older and having heard the same question every single time someone sees me together with them instead of saying yes, they are twins, I now want to say “oh no the hospital had a buy one get one free offer”

  1. How did you conceive twins? Are they natural?

Natural as opposed to? Artificial? I didn’t know there was such thing as an artificial baby. Knowingly or unknowingly this is a very nosy question. It can be so sensitive to ask someone about their reproductive system. And even if the person did go through a fertility treatment asking such question makes it seem as though they are somehow less worthy? Again my reproductive system is no ones business!

  1. Do twins run in your family?

No there are no twins in my family, my husband’s family or even my neighbor’s family! This is again another way of being intrusive and trying to ask the same thing as the above question.

  1. Which one is your favorite?

As a kid we all always feel like the older sibling is our parents favorite. But after becoming a parent myself, I’ve come to realize that as parent you really don’t have a favorite. I usually just give the name of the kid who would’ve troubled me the least on that day. So if you ask me the same question again the next day you may get a different answer.

  1. Which ones older?

Well this is not one of the worse questions, but I always wonder why people would want to know. What difference does a minute or two make.

I’ve had people who once find out which one is older start calling him the elder brother and unknowingly puts pressure on him to behave more mature. Which I believe is really not fair on him.

  1. Why do you dress them alike?

Because I get a discount on bulk shopping! just kidding!

I dress them alike as one; I really don’t have the time to shop for myself let alone shop for the kids. So when I do venture out to shop I just really find it easier to just pick two of the same design that I like.

And secondly my kids are going through a phase where they always want the same thing that the other one has. So if one of them has a plane on his shirt, I dare not make the other one wear a shirt with a train!

So really it’s just to make my life a little less complicated.

 

  1. Do you want more children? You must be done now or you should try again for a daughter.

Yes, I would love to have more kids but my husband & I don’t want to sell our kidneys to have to decide which one to send to school!

The funny part is I can totally imagine the same people saying what was she thinking if I do decide to have more kids.

Why do people think its ok for them to think that if you have 2 children your family is complete, but then if you don’t have both the genders then maybe you should try again!

Btw, this question is always followed by what if you have twins again! To which my usual answer would be that I’ll just donate one! Simple!

  1. I’ve always wanted twins!

Really!! Good on you! As I never wanted twins! I was scared as S#!T when I found out that I was carrying twins. I was definitely not mentally prepared for what was coming. In fact I actually got depressed.

Imagine not being able to get through half of the doors, imagine not being able to get out of the supermarket queue, as your stroller won’t go through. Imagine having to keep running in opposite directions every time we step out of the house, making me rethink my decision of not putting them on a leash! (ok kidding again!)

  1. How do you manage?

So how do I really manage handling two babies at once! Because I have super powers that you don’t! Oh how I wish that was true. I usually don’t know how to answer this one. As I know most of the time people who ask this are not really interested to know the truth. I’m not going to just randomly tell you that I have nervous breakdowns, some days I just want to run away. I’ve also mentioned this in one of my previous posts and then there were two that I don’t know what it feels like to have one. This is absolutely normal for me.

 

A lot of these questions are answered in this manner usually in my thought bubble. So in case you are someone I know and have asked me any of these questions now you have my answers.

 

Leave me your comments below and let me know how many of you have actually asked these questions to a twin mom! Common now don’t be shy!

 

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7 Comments

  • I have heard my friend of one-year old twin girls say the same thing. Plus they ask if they are identical and how you tell them apart. Doesn’t sound like it gets any easier as they get older either. Good luck

  • Love this post. I would love to say I am surprised that people would have the audacity to ask if they were natural but sadly I’m not. My oldest son is darker than my husband and I and people often asked if my husband was the father! Like your reproductive system, my sex life is also none of their business!! Thanks for sharing 🙂

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